I’ve had paranormal experiences since I was a child and when I was younger they terrified me. I did not understand them. All I saw in the media were horror films about ghosts and aliens that portrayed them as evil attacking monsters, so I began to greatly fear my own experiences. I was terrified of “the monster hiding under my bed”, the entity that walked around the house, and the ghost that changed the stations on my boom box.
I grew up in Southwestern Virginia which was largely conservative, and although my family was liberal, spiritually-connected and progressive in many ways, my family was also made up of skeptics that “don’t believe it until you see it”. I largely didn’t have anyone to talk to and help me understand what I was seeing, and to realize that there was no need to fear those experiences.
Due to this, I shoved this part of me deep down into myself, closed the door, and locked it up. Phew! the “monsters” were gone and I was living as a “light and love” sparkly fairy with rainbows coming out of my ass. I was unconsciously avoiding ever returning to this part of myself again.
The thing about your true nature is you cannot avoid it for too long…
The “demons” hiding in my unconscious first started to reappear through physical symptoms when I was 22. They showed up through my skin. Cystic acne took over my face, chest and back. No matter what I tried to topically heal it, the real issue was internal for me. I was avoiding my own shadows and fears, I was “uncomfortable in my own skin”, and my unconscious was revealing itself to me in a way I couldn’t ignore. On top of this, I became deeply depressed and developed insomnia. After a week of getting extremely sick with the flu and nasty stuff coming out of both ends, I was like, “alright already!” That’s when I had the realization that I needed to go to graduate school to study therapy from an embodied perspective. I needed to learn how to listen to my body.
When I signed up for the Somatic Counseling program, I signed up to face the aspects of myself that were shoved beneath that door, deep in my unconscious. A lot happened…but that is for another article. The gist is that I had to face my “demons”, befriend them, love them, and realize they are part of my power and part of my gift to others. I had to learn that there is nothing to fear and develop understanding, discernment and boundaries in the “seen” and “unseen” realms. My supernatural experiences have returned and I’m not afraid anymore. I've integrated the understanding that these experiences are inter-dimensional, and much more complex than "seeing dead people". (still a catchy title though)
I’ve witnessed what we may call miracles, angels, transmissions, healings, ascended masters, good-intentioned ETs and beings that live in a higher frequency. It's important to note that “higher frequency” does NOT mean “better”. I’ve also seen entities that linger around substances or people’s addictions, entities that linger around after they have departed from their physical body, manipulative trickster “shamans” and “gurus”, psychological control and ill-intentioned ETs. It's important to note that there is no reason to fear these beings; only pay attention, as knowledge is power and love conquers all.
I’ve seen Souls of the living, the dead, and the disembodied.
I’ve also seen that there IS such thing as “good” and “evil”, and there IS spiritual warfare going on in other dimensions just as there IS on-the-ground warfare going on here on Earth. Though, I don’t like the words “good” and “evil” to describe this phenomenon. It’s more accurately the "truth of connection" and “the illusion of separation”. Changing vocabulary around describing this paradigm is important. Saying, “good and evil” or “light and dark” could create more illusions of separation and division if the meaning is not unpacked. “Darkness” is not inherently bad or evil, and should not be portrayed that way because it subconsciously instills fear and negative bias in people’s minds. This subconscious bias leads to a fear of death, the Soul, deep intimacy and transformation, people of color, the womb, the feminine, the shadow, elders, nature, the gestation phases in life, anything occult and the great mystery.
I’ve learned the importance of discernment and boundaries in other dimensions just as much as I’ve learned those same lessons in my day-to-day life. The various realms of existence inform each other and none of them is “better” than the other, even if it’s a “higher frequency”. The way I can best explain this is like the colors of the rainbow. They vibrate with different frequencies of light wave, sound, and experience; so too do the dimensions. You wouldn’t say purple is “better” than red, now would you? The same goes for other dimensions and anyone who says higher frequency is “better” than lower frequency is contributing to the illusion of separation, giving their power away, and quite frankly could use a divine bitch-slap off their high horse. (I use the word, “bitch” with respect and honor to its original meaning as badass warrior goddess Artemis)
And “no”, I’ve never done ayahuasca or LSD.
The majority of my experiences have been gathered while sober, meditating, in nature, in dreamtime and unexpectedly in ways that initially scared the crap out of me and I had to struggle/grow through the process of understanding them. I tried mushrooms for the first time on my 28th birthday. I saw the wisdom in using that plant medicine with respect. I also saw the great harm that can be done trying anything “willy nilly” and without discernment as there are tricksters in other realms just as there are here walking down Wall Street.
Many people don’t realize that they are creating karma, to clean-up karma, to create karma, to clean-up karma in some spiritual, self-growing, medicine ceremony, sacred sex communities. In this cycle we can be fooled into thinking we are “doing the work” because the work we are doing feels deeply intimate. Creating and cleaning-up karma feels intimate! What many don’t realize is that being stuck in this cycle is actually more like a spiritual masturbation, trading parts-for-parts, pac-man hunger game that Buddhists refer to as Samsara. (I know what this looks/feels like because I’ve been there before.)
I share my experience to let you know you are not alone and there is nothing to fear. I share my experience so that you can become aware of your own discernment in other realms or spiritual/self-growth communities. And lastly, I share to encourage you to take your true radiant Soul-power back from where you are giving it away.